Without a Dream
by Saint Lonely
Summary: Rogue has done something terrible, and now Bobby must pay for it. Can she hold onto him before he slips, or will she catch him before he falls?


Disclaimer: I own nothing.   
  
Without a Dream  
  
Rogue let herself slide to the floor. She wrapped her arms around her folded legs and buried her head inside them. She feared touching even herself now, although she knew she shouldn't. She'd hurt someone she loved, the one who's heart she held. She prayed vivaciously for his life, but her prayers often never came true. She'd lost all hope, and long ago, and she didn't think her prayers were even worth the time they took to relay into the high Heavens.  
  
"Please, God," she begged into her knees, where her face lay entombed. Somewhere, deep inside of her, she felt something slip away, fading and falling, never to live in her depths again. "Let him live. Let him find his way back to me."  
  
She felt as if she were sleeping, yet she was awake, in tune with each of her senses. It was something new, and she didn't like it at all. Her world was spinning way too quickly out of control, and there was no one to blame but herself. She was in trouble, and she had no where to turn. Who would help her, the mutant who betrayed her kind's solitary rule: never use your powers against another mutant.   
  
Rogue felt like a criminal, but there was good reason for it.  
  
And now she was left stranded, alone, without even a dream for comfort.  
  
-=-=-=-=-=-=-  
  
"Bobby? Is that you?" Rogue called into the darkness. A lone figure walked farther away from her, not heeding her cries. It sauntered away, deeper into the black. "Bobby, don't leave me!!"   
  
Rogue quickened her steps, but so did the silhouette in front of her. Suddenly, it turned to the left and disappeared into the shadows. She stopped abruptly, almost tripping over her own feet. She searched for the figure again, but failed. The room began to reel around her, confusing her sense of direction. She knew not where it had gone, or why.  
  
"You can't leave me!"  
  
She was alone again. He wasn't there, and her heart no longer beat inside her chest, but in the profoundness of her lover's icy palm, and now she'd never get it back. She couldn't survive without him, her heart. His final breath would be hers as well, and she could feel him inhaling, so deep, so terminal.  
  
It was all her fault. If she wasn't… the way she was, then none of this would have ever happened. Everything would be okay, and she'd be at home like she'd never left, wrapped up in blankets on her bed, without a care in the world. It would all be okay if…  
  
Rogue paused mid-thought. Without her strange and dangerous power, she would have never met Bobby, and she would have never been in love. Her life now would be nonexistent, and she'd still be unhappy. Why did she have to touch him?  
  
"Why me, Rogue? Millions of guys who would fall willingly at your feet, and you choose me?" A voice from the shadows. Bobby's voice. She would know that tone anywhere  
  
"I can see a thousand faces in my mind, and behind each one of them are a thousand glorious memories. Each of them can offer me something, and each appeals more than the last. But yours, Bobby Drake… all I want are yours."  
  
"It's dangerous."  
  
"And all the more desirable. I can't live without you. Heartbreak eats away slowly, but quickens every day. I'll go crazy without you, and I won't be able to live. Don't leave me, please!"  
  
Rogue could already see his face fading from her memory. His voice was leaving, the echoes that resounded throughout her head the only remainders. He couldn't leave her, not now. It was too soon, he was too young. The darkness was pressing down on her, holding her back, and she couldn't chase after her lover's wandering soul.  
  
"Hold on to me, love. You know can't stay, its impossible. Just hold on to me, please? All I wanted to say... was I love you, and I'm not afraid anymore." And his voice was slipping away again, almost gone. The chords strummed in her memory, but she couldn't hold on to them. Everything was happening too fast!  
  
"Take my hand!" she screamed, clawing out to find him. Her gloved fingers latched onto something, but the silken mitts made her grasp decrepit, useless, and it slipped away.  
  
"You can't save me, Rogue. I'm not there anymore. I've already dropped away."  
  
"You can stay, Bobby! You can fight it! Don't leave me… Please! Don't leave me…"  
  
"I love you Rogue, I am always with you, and I will never leave you."  
  
Rogue stepped forward, but her body was weighed down. Guilt… She stumbled to the ground, soaked in the river of her own tears that had been flowing at her feet. Her world lurched forward, the scenery at all sides were blurring, leaving her behind. The darkness was being replaced with a obscured shade, and she couldn't see past her own fingers.  
  
A hand gently grabbed her shoulder and shook her, waking her from her dreams. Beams of light filed in through the unshaded window, and she had to blink a time or two to see straight. Her dream wasn't a reality after all, and Bobby was okay.  
  
"Rogue!" Despair clung to Bobby's voice, yearning the past, hanging on for the future he knew would not come. She found herself curled on the floor, but now she wove her frame around her lover's. She was wrong again, and it was all too true.  
  
"Bobby, don't leave me!" she sobbed, squeezing his hands in her own gloved ones.   
  
"I love you. Don't leave, Bobby…" She felt him gently push against her skin, and she knew it was all the strength he had left. She realized how strong and healthy she felt now, and it all was becoming clear. Rogue, in touching him, had drained him of all his strength and all his powers. He was now a mere, weak, human being, and his old self plagued her mind.  
  
"I love you, Rogue. I am always with you, and I will never leave you."  
  
Rogue sucked in her breath. The dream!! This wasn't real, it was all a dream. It's not real, she repeated to herself. Wake up! It's not real. He wouldn't leave you, fool! It's a dream!  
  
Bobby's chest heaved and stiffened, erect, mid-air. Rogue adhered herself to him, and lay her cheek against his. "Please stay! Don't go!" He couldn't feel her against himself, just knew that there was an extra weight holding his spirit down.  
  
"Rogue," Bobby gasped, and his body fell, limp, on the bed. One final beep from his heart monitor resounded, long and echoing inside her ears.   
  
"NO! Come back! You can't leave me! Not now… Not now…" she wailed, clawing at his clothes. "You can't… can't leave me!"  
  
Her chest heaved into his with a sob, and she pressed her lips against his, trying to breath life back into him. "You're not gone! You alive, you're fine! You're not gone! You can't be!!! You… can't be…" Her body shook with silent sobs, and a pair of arms wrapped around her waist.  
  
"He's gone, kid," whispered Logan, and he gathered her up in his arms. Ororo and Jean somberly entered, covered Bobby's lifeless body, and Logan carried Rogue away.  
  
"Let me go! He needs me!" Rogue pounded on his chest, beating out her racing pulse. Outside the room, Logan set her down. Once again, she slumped to the ground, wrapped her legs, and buried her head. She was falling, too quickly, into a world she didn't know. She wanted everything back the way it was, and she wanted to be in his arms again.  
  
Her body was numb, too frail and weak to move. All of her life force had drained away, and Bobby's had gone with it. She didn't understand what had happened, and refused to accept it either.   
  
And she was utterly alone now, without even a dream for her future.  
  
"I love you," she whispered, looking up to the Heavens. "Never leave me…"  
  
Author's Note: Did you like it?? I heavily revised it. Well, sorta. I added some stuff and made it a lot longer… And better, don't ya think?   
  
I posted it once before, but I decided to re-post it. I hope I get more reviews than I did before...  
  
I revised Crimson Regrets too, so read that also!   
  
Please review! 


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